Leaving this world is something hard to except…
Leaving this world is a reality that every man upon this earth can not escape…
( this post is something that I feel deep in my heart)… When it is my time to leave this cruel world the only thing I fear is my youngest daughter, actually all my children. with so many things happening in this world it is hard to trust that any official will love, care and have compassion for a child. So why have a baby in a world like this? Even wealthy people have children and, yet fail to realize the reality of this injured world. If you are not there for your children how are they being treated? who is doing there hair? feeding them? loving them? giving them the bond they need without molesting them. I am so scared and worried. The reason why I chose to talk about this is because, lately I have not been feeling well at all.
I have not been bitten my any insect, however, I have been on medications and I hope that it is not to late because, I stop taking everything. I wake up in the middle of the night with a terrible stomach ache, and feeling dizzy a little dizzy. I went to the Doctor ER and they did every test from Gallbladder, Liver, Kidney’s, Intestines and, they can not find anything wrong with me. They said it might be a Virus and it has to run it’s course. Then I thought well the other ER said that ” there is an AIRBORNE virus that attacks the Respatory system it sickens only Infants, elderly, and people with a weak immune system.. When I started to feel this virus I thought to myself ” what did I do to anybody in order to deserve something like this?” I thought about all the things people did to me when I never did nothing to nobody. I was imprisoned because, I told about being Raped, I was almost beat to death by my half sisters, I was kept in a shack for 8 in a half years by a terrible boyfriend who used me for anal sex I asked God ” Why? why is this happening to me? I do not want to die, not yet not so soon I am only 36 years old. I have never wrong anyone in my life if I did I knew no better so I should not be held accountable.
At first I always thought that movies was real like the Hero always wins. I was so wrong and I hate that I was always the Hero for people who hated me all the while. I wish I was never there Hero I wish that I would have stayed home and when I think about it God tried to warn me by letting me have my first baby at 14 years old I did not know. I guess maybe in my next life time I will be smarter because, in this life I was so stupid trying to be a friend to people who wanted to kill me planning to kill me the entire time and my own half sister in on it.
( my stomach hurts so bad right NOW!) :(……..
It is okay though I was baptized and my Heavenly Father has forgiven my sins as a human off spring of Adam and Eve. So with that said I forgive all of you who tried to kill me. However, if I do get better and make it through this do not ever in your thoughts ask me to be there for you ever. You are smart enough to set me up and hurt me nearly kill me and put my babies through this which is indeed highly evil. I do not ever want to see your face the only thing you will ever have of me is a memory of a sweet sincere person you was always able to count on I’ll never ever be there for you. Ask God he will help you I have already done my part confessing my sins to God in Baptism Now it is yours.
LOVE ALWAYS: Empress Silverann